5 Common Mindsets That Get in the Way of You and Your Dreams

5 Common Mindsets That Get in the Way of You and Your Dreams5 Common Mindsets That Get in the Way of You and Your DreamsWhats that one big dream you have for your life?Is it to build your own business? Scaleyour company globally? Continuously advance in your organization and become an executive? Sell your company and then be able to invest and help other peoplebuild their dreams?Does it include meeting that partner you can build a life with? Or, perhaps packingup and moving somewhere you have always dreamed of?One thing I have learned in my work is that everyone has their own very unique dream.I probedone of my clients- a talented and successful37-year-old graphicdesigner with her own design company- onwhat her long-term professional geistesbild and dream for the future was.Without hesitation, shetold me My dream is to have a petting zoo. I love animals and I want to be able to bring joy to peoples lives through animals.Petting zoo was quite definitelythe most unique answer I had eve r received.While this happened to be my clients retirement dream, why notlagestart making that dream arealitynow?Many of us get locked into mindsets that dictate what we think weshoulddo or what or how we think we should be- you know- according tosociety,culture, or family.We have the propensity to take those outside pressures, internalize them, and then impose them on ourselves. But, you can learn to let go of these stifling? mindsetsto truly live andlead authentically.Most people are held back bymore than one of these mindsets, but usually oneis more pronounced than the others. This is the mindset you should attack getting rid offirst.1. People PleasingMindsetYou have aconstant need to pleaseand be liked by others.You dont speak up and voice your true opinion out offear of not being liked or not pleasing others.BarrierYou dont take risks because you fear what others will think of you. You dont speak up and offer your difference of opinionin a meeting, and your company ends up maki ng a big mistake.You often commit to too much, and you feel aconstant sense ofoverwhelm.ActionAs a recovering people-pleaser myself, Ill tell you what has helped me let go of this mindset. Start with blurting out whats actually on your mind. Ditch the people-pleasing filter. And,start playing what I call The Disappointment Game. Practice disappointing someone every day.I am not suggesting that you goaround being a jerk, but instead I want you to start operating in a way that is true to yourself, which in turn might happen to disappoint some people along the way. This could meansaying no to social commitments or that non-required project at work.2. ComparisonMindsetYou constantlycompare yourself to others. You say things to yourself like, Shes smarter than me, They are so muchmore creative than me, or Hecan do it better than me.BarrierBy constantly comparing yourself to others, you punishand put yourself down. You do not take risks because you have convinced yourself that others can do it better than you. So, you watchother peopleachieveyourdreams.ActionStart keeping a tally on how many times per day you find that you compare yourself to others. Awareness is the first step to squashing this mindset.3. Rule FollowingMindsetYoufeel the need to constantly follow the rules.You do what you think you shoulddo, not always what youwantto do. In fact, you maynot even know what youwant.BarrierYou keep your ideas to yourself because they might go against the grain and break the rules.You are scared to stand out, so you stay small. You maintain the status quo.ActionIntentionally break a rule every day. Im not suggesting engaging in illegal or illicit behavior, but make a point to break a social norm every day. For example, if your social norm is going with the flow, be the leader in the group and offer your opinion before anyone else.4. PerfectionismMindsetYou feel the constant need to strive forperfection and for your life to appear perfect.BarrierYou dont take risks out of fear you will make a mistake or you wont do it perfectly.This is a self-destructive and addictive mindset with anunattainable goalperfection.You hide behindthe constant striving for perfection, which prevents the world fromseeingyou for who you truly are- imperfections and all.ActionFirst take these words fromDr.BrenBrownto heart Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, its often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis.Then watch Dr. Browns Ted Talk,The Power of Vulnerabilityand read her bookThe Gifts of Imperfection Let Go of Who You Think Youre Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.5. WorkaholicismMindset You work all the time and do not take time for yourself. You think you need to constantly work to prove yourself and to live up to the expectations of others. Your work defines you. You are burnt out or at the brink of burnout.Barrier Your personal life suffers. You may work to avoid feeling lonely. You dont live in the moment because even when you are not at work, you are thinking about your work. Your relationships suffer. You might be stuck in a career or job that you dont even realize you dontreally like because you have never takentime for self-reflection.ActionStart with self-care. Book a massage, go for a run,plan a dinner with a friend, take a spontaneous weekend trip. Start by doing something one time perweek that is just for you and not work related. When you are ready, start makingsure you do something for yourself every day.More From Inc.Science Says You Shouldnt Work More Than This Number of Hours a WeekHeres a Sandwich Recipe to Revolutionize Your At-Work LunchThis 10-Minute Routine Is the Ultimate Mind Cleanse